A New Era

Wow that's it. I'm right there. Second phase is over.
I am facing the real world now - serious cruel world. It is third phase!

I feel a little bit scared, yet excited! 

Stress, people, papers, time, management, responsibility, secrecy, seriousness, more papers and more stress.

I am a trainee now.

First day I almost broke down. I wanted to cry. Too many things at once.
I'm there, my trainer telling me what to do, explaining things to me as obvious things, expecting me to know everything he just said and understand immediately, forgetting that he's been in this so many years before me and took him maybe a year to understand it and be that good. But oh I just nod. Yeah because I am the trainee, "the almighty".  

It's okay. I know it's just the first day. It happened to me before. First year in college, first day at the job in the office, I was responsible for all the files, putting things in order, writing things, printing and sending. One mistake I do ruins the whole thing. I felt so much under pressure at that time that I thought I won't be able to handle it. I felt that I don't want this because I felt I can't do it. But I did. And I did it good. My boss was very pleased with me and all I could do.

I'm sure this time will be the same. First days may seem hard and stressful, but I need to pull myself together because it's okay. It's just new. Things will get better as soon as I get to know the people I work with more and feel a little bit more calm. :)