Taking Things for Granted

So many things we take for granted, in our lives and assume in others' lives too, until the awkward thing happens. 

The other day, I had a meetup with a client. He was an old man. He came with his son, that was maybe in his mid forties. I said Hello and shook my client's hand. Then I reached out to shake his son's hand. 

His son didn't mind my hand. He left me hanging and stayed quiet. Fortunately, at that moment I wasn't looking at the man but talking to my client while my hand was hanging in the air.

I waited a little, I didn't know what to do. Should I pull back my hand or what. I thought this is rude, because he was holding papers in one hand and the other hand was free. 

Then, the man grabbed what he had in his right hand with his left hand, and reached out with his left hand to shake my hand. 

It was weird but it hit me that there was something wrong. 

As our conversation continued, the man mentioned that he is paralyzed-partially paralyzed and can't move his right hand. 

Oops. So inconvenient. 

But I couldn't know and I bet it happens to him often. 

That awkward situation made me think of all the things we take for granted and all the things we assume are fine in other people just because it looks fine to us and/or we don't suffer from a condition that they have, so we take their looks for granted as if they're fine because they look fine. 

We don't think about things that we don't have or don't suffer from. We think everybody is just like us, until we see something obviously different on them. 

I immediately thought the man is rude and didn't think he might have a problem, because his hand looked normal. 

Today, at the office, the cleaning lady came and sat with me a little. We were just us. I stayed over time because I was stressed and I had work to finish before I leave. 

We started talking. 

It was the first time I am put in a situation were I am referred to as "rich". She kept mentioning "you, the rich" and "us, the poor". Who uses these terms these days?! I never thought or considered myself rich!

She said she wishes to die than live poor. 

She thinks I can do anything with money. Go anywhere, buy everything I want. And she is struggling for a piece of bread.

She said she asks God sometimes, why were they born poor. They all work and yet they run after their piece of bread. No matter how much they work, their bank account remains in minus. She said she wishes to be rich, to have money, to be able to enjoy life. They are not happy. To enjoy life you need money. They didn't go to school. Because to go to school you need to have money. 

She asked me about my family and I . She was amazed by the fact that my siblings and I and both my parents went to school and have work. Her face was pretty amazed, something I haven't ever seen before. Her face turned bright. She asked me then about my father, and said with sighs "a doctor... Wow, that must be very nice."

OMG.    

You could tell how much she feels bad in the inside for her background. She even told me, the first day she started working here, that she doesn't like to work when people are around. She wants a job where she can work while no one sees her. She feels embarrassed of herself and of what she does. 

Today she told me about her son and daughter. The girl doesn't know Hebrew very well and she is slow a little bit. She's not getting accepted to work anywhere. And the boy wants to go to the army, because he will get a good salary and because he won't find a job anywhere else. His parents aren't happy about his will. They are afraid he would get killed in a war... But they don't have a choice because they know, in this country, in the future, he will be ok, he will get far and live well. 

She explained that when she turns to God asking why was she born poor... She realizes it's not that she was born poor, it's because her background is poor, and she can't do anything about it. If your parents are poor, you will be poor too, because they won't have the money to get you to college and get you a degree and a good job. So you end up poor, just like them. It's something horrible that you can't do anything about. Even if you want a change, without the money, you can't get the change. 

To me hearing all that made me cringe a little, almost had tears falling. Imagine she couldn't even read my name that's on the wall, my surname, because my forename she knows. 

It was incredible. I feel so blessed. Somethings we don't think about, because we live these things. We don't realize how much we are blessed for the things we have that others don't have, because we don't see the other type of people, we don't meet them, because it's like we live in our own bubble. We know the people that are like us. If you are rich, your company is rich too.

For instance, when we meet someone new, we ask them questions like: What did you study and which school did you go to. We don't question IF. Instead of asking the question "Did you go to school" we jump to the question "where" and "when". We assume they did, because all the people we know and all those around us, did go to school.

We don't see or think beyond. But we should. We need to realize we are blessed. 

They say money doesn't buy happiness. I tried to show the woman that being rich doesn't mean you are happy. Having a "crappy" job could be much better than any other job, because maybe you have less worries, less problems, less work hours, more time at home, more time with your loved ones. I showed her that here I am, not married (she was astonished that I am single), 28 years old, been studying all the time and working till late hours every day, missing out on life.... Every person has his own problems. The poor, the rich, all have problems. 

She was okay. But I am not. I am at the office at this moment, thinking about this woman and about life in general. I feel I have so much gratitude inside of me. 

I am healthy. I have money. I have family, friends, house, dog, job, college degrees.... Everything I wanted I did. The most important things in life, that so many people wish to have, I have!

I always said that when I finish my studies, have a job, have enough money in my bank account, I will keep some money aside, to give out to the poor. I chose to study and practice Law because I enjoy it. I work not precisely for the money, but for me. (because between us, if it was for the money, it's not worthwhile) So since I work for myself, and basically, to help others by being their lawyer, I will also help in another way, by giving out some of the money I make to the people in need. If I have enough money for my things, I don't need all the money. I can give out some to those who could even with just a little, change their whole life! 

After what happened today, I think I am going to start this from now. 

When you are used to having something, it's very hard to appreciate it, because you see it as something normal to have, until you see something else. 

Start cherishing every little thing you have!